☷Can the Army Help You Be a Better Parent Yes and No
U.S. Army ( By Press Release office)
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Being a parent while in the Army requires loyalty and balance . ) Do the same beliefs that define what is expected of a Soldier translate to being a good parent Staff Sgt . Zachery Rojas , a drill sergeant at Fort Benning , Georgia , and father of a one - year - old daughter , said his career as a Soldier has prepared him for parenthood . “From the start of your career from basic training to where I ' m at now , you ' re always taught it ' s just not about you . . . you ' re taught to care about more than yourself , ” said Rojas . Soldiers are trained to support one another , especially under challenging circumstances . The loyalty you have towards your fellow Soldiers to make a unit strong is the same loyalty you can use to strengthen your Family . If a child is having a tough time , a comforting parent is there to help them work through their emotions . Supportive parents also have the responsibility of teaching their children to share the feelings of others . “Helping kids to be able to have empathy and feel what other people feel is essential for building healthy relationships , ” said Dr . Jim Taylor , a parenting and child development expert and author of five parenting books . Do all teachings of Army life translate well into parenting Not quite . The Army instills Soldiers with lessons that prepare them for life , and perhaps for one of the most difficult missions of all , being a parent . There are many things you learn as a Soldier that can help make you a better parent , however there are some things that can be left on post . “After working a long day of training and pushing yourself mentally and physically with your unit , there’s a time when the Soldier ends and the parent begins , ” Rojas said . “I am the party person when I get home . . . let ' s play with the stuffed animals , let ' s walk to the park , let ' s go on the slide a million times , ” Rojas said . “You have to understand like ‘this is work , that ' s home , ’” he said . Army Values That Are Great for Parenting Loyalty – One of the most basic foundations for children ' s development is feeling loved , valued , and supported . Respect – Every child is different , they have different needs , personalities , and capabilities . It is important to respect who they are as individuals . Mutual respect between child and parent builds stronger relationships . Integrity – If kids sense that you have integrity , you have their best interests at heart , and you ' re being honest with them , then they learn to follow your lead . Beliefs That Don ' t Translate Well for Parenting Rank Hierarchy – In combat , following orders can be a matter of life or death . At home , children are naturally rebellious , and as they become teens , they need the freedom to grow as independent adults . Being overly strict may hinder them from dealing with circumstances in the real world or learning to problem solve on their own . Being Unemotional – Traditionally , Soldiers learn to “suck it up and drive on , ” however , it is important for children ( and adults ) to feel their feelings , as emotions can help people take action to fix a problem . Parents should not invalidate their kid’s emotions or ask their kids to repress their feelings . Instead , they should help their children recognize , understand , and manage their emotions . Yelling – New Soldiers coming from all walks of life need to be molded into Army life . Drill sergeants may yell to get a recruit ' s attention or enforce discipline to turn civilians into Soldiers ready for combat . However , children aren’t Soldiers . One of the most important factors for children to grow into emotionally healthy adults is having a sense of security and safety at home .
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